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Name: Sandy Bernabei
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Monday, November 5th 2012 - 04:56:56 PM
Name: claire
Comments:im a servivor of rape it happend to me when i was 3 and finished when i was 27 i have had help to get me throught it all and im now a happer person
Monday, October 8th 2012 - 04:41:53 AM
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Sunday, September 30th 2012 - 05:49:26 AM
Name: Tamar @Deborah
Comments:Just do what u feel is right for u and your child, follow your heart... If you feel an obligation to exspose him... Do so! Even if it is hard for a time its one thing u can do to to protect others...
Wednesday, September 12th 2012 - 10:32:30 PM
Name: Deborah Scott
Comments:I was raped 13 years ago, i felt so ashamed he litterally said don' make a big deal out of it, this was my partner, i had a child from him. At the time my little girl was only 2 years old. I did not want to report this in fear of losing my little girl.I did finally kick him out a year later , i stood my ground with this guy and told him to get the hell out of my life. I know to this day hoe he treats other women and i feel an obligation to stand up and report him about this rape or he is just going to to keep getting away with his abuse with women, what can i do.
Thursday, July 12th 2012 - 08:06:17 PM
Name: Tamar @rose
Comments:Feel free to talk on here and please let me know if I can help... We all are in this together...
Dont let it shatter u inside... Find someone u can trust to talk to... Or a couselor... I pray you find help dear...<3 someday... The people who hurt us will answer to God for every evil...
Thursday, April 12th 2012 - 10:45:14 PM
Name: Rose
Comments:It's coming up to 7 year anniversary and I'm really struggling, don't know what to do.
Thursday, April 5th 2012 - 01:51:32 PM
Name: @ andee
Comments:Yes tell your mom! Don't keep that inside... If anything maybe she can help<3 tell a teacher you can trust privately that u need help and exsplain. Yes u might but its worth it break free... Plz don't give up on life because of a wicked mans sin...
Monday, March 19th 2012 - 01:58:11 AM
Name: Tamar @ babee
Comments:Do whatever you have to to get away from him... Only then can u begin to heal... What a disgrace to man kind!!! To do that to u. Get away somehow... My heart bleeds for you...
Monday, March 19th 2012 - 01:55:09 AM
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Monday, March 12th 2012 - 11:01:10 AM
Name: Andee
Comments:My parents are divorce and honestly I'm so broken over It, it has been about a year now and right after my mom told me about the divorce school got worse people made rumors calling me a bitch ect ect. Now it's getting harder and harder I try to commit suicide every week .. I kinda want to know if I should tell me mom..? But I don't want to be a disappointment to the family again.. Should I tell Her? What would happen? Would I go to the hospital ?
Thursday, March 1st 2012 - 10:05:56 PM
Name: Babee
Comments:Hi

I've come to this site because i've been raped by my ex brutally! He raped me constantly over one year period! He's got away with it because the detectives that were assigned to the the case were men and very insensitive! They called me a liar before they even heard my side! When my ex heard what these detectives had done he was amused and was advantaged by that! He has carried on raping me and beating me ever since hearing what the detectives had said to me! The only thing he had to say to me was "you've lost everything, your family, the man you love, your friends and you know what i can rape you as many times as i want and you can cry to whoever you want but no one will ever believe you"
that hurt and i begged him to stop over and over but he never did!
I am so damaged now!
Monday, February 6th 2012 - 12:31:17 PM
Name: Babee
Comments:Hi

I've come to this site because i've been raped by my ex brutally! He raped me constantly over one year period! He's got away with it because the detectives that were assigned to the the case were men and very insensitive! They called me a liar before they even heard my side! When my ex heard what these detectives had done he was amused and was advantaged by that! He has carried on raping me and beating me ever since hearing what the detectives had said to me! The only thing he had to say to me was "you've lost everything, your family, the man you love, your friends and you know what i can rape you as many times as i want and you can cry to whoever you want but no one will ever believe you"
that hurt and i begged him to stop over and over but he never did!
I am so damaged now!
Monday, February 6th 2012 - 12:30:30 PM
Name: Tamar
Comments:I'm still raw but healing...
And this def makes love that much more complicated...
The fear is very real... it may seem strange to be afraid of nearly every guy in existance but its very real... U can have flashbacks and nightmares for no other reason than u miss someone who died or someone u love is attracted to you or a nice guy smiles at you... But no matter what I've been through in my life I know God is with me now n He'll always protect me because His love is pure and true...<3 and that keeps me living and fighting for a time when it will be easier...
Tuesday, January 31st 2012 - 01:50:50 PM
Name: Tamara
Comments:Dear there already is someone who loves u and you can trust... God... And someday in the right time and place for u I pray He will send u the perfect guy... Plz don't give up...<3 and prayers
Thursday, January 5th 2012 - 11:17:55 PM
Name: fairy
Comments:I hope we all remain strong in the face of people who are cruel to us.

I was abused all my life. I can't hold down a job or be in a relatioship. I push everyone away b/c i'm affraid of strangers n b/c i havent found somone who loves me.

My ex would have sex with me even though i dissociated and everytime I would explai that i dont know how to say no he'd ignore that n still sleep with me. I send mixed signals so its not his fault; i just wanted him to protect me. I hate sex and I don't know how to find anyone to love me.

i feel like my journey to healing is coming to an end b/c i can't find any support. I just need someone who trully loves me.
Tuesday, January 3rd 2012 - 12:16:13 AM
Name: Charity Ray
Comments:Love Through the Pain
Laugh Through the Tears
Live Through it All!
Tuesday, December 27th 2011 - 04:43:47 PM
Name: Tamar
Comments:Dear Sophia,
Don't give up and keep fighting you cannot change the past but the future is a clean page and you can control that...You are a survivor I'm praying for you...
Thursday, December 8th 2011 - 08:44:24 AM
Name: Sophie.
Comments:When I was nine years old for two years I was sexually abused. I was shut in my own bedroom, where an older family member did what they like to me. I hate my body being sexual, I lost loads of weight and I gained loads of weight.... anything to hide a sexual frame. I cannot have romantic relationships, or sexual relationships. I get flash backs and nightmares. BUT I want to reclaim my life. I want to get over what happend to me. I want to be strong, be a fignter, be a recoverer, a survivour.
Wednesday, December 7th 2011 - 11:55:35 AM
Name: Sierra
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Friday, December 2nd 2011 - 09:14:51 AM
Name: Tamar
Comments:Someday I want to volunteer or work at a crysis center for girls just like us... Idk if I'll ever have an oppertunity and for some it must seem a strange thing to want to do...but who knows more what we go through than ourselves?
Sunday, November 13th 2011 - 12:30:15 PM
Name: Tamar
Comments:Cannot sleep I hate to bother fiance even though I'm talking to him...oh Father y couldnt I have one break to not be haunted by things I couldn't control...my mother knows now she says I could try to prosecute but I cannot tell anyone else...I can't tell even my father because I can never tell my natural father everything I long too...it's all going to be ok Lord willing but its nights like tonight that make it harder...
Friday, November 4th 2011 - 12:08:34 AM
Name: Tamar
Comments:Dear katherine,
But you do deserve a fresh start a new future...u didn't bring any of that on ur self...I know we all wish we could wakeup again before any of this happened to us and start again...we can't but we can't let evil people and events ruin our futures...plz let me know if I can help were in this together...
Wednesday, October 12th 2011 - 03:42:08 PM
Name: katherine feler
Comments:i was raped by an older boy at my school. i was 12 and he was 17. i had always had a crush on him because i thought that he was fit. one day he offered to help me with my jomework so i openly agreed. when we got to my house he shuved me onto my bed. i didnt know what was happening and tried to struggle. but he brought out a knife and held it to my throat, "you are going to do exactly what i tell you to do" he said "if you screem or struggle i will kill you. do you understand?" i nodded. h let me up and told me to face him with my hands by my sides. he stepped towards me and slid his hands under my top. he undid my bra and ripped my top off. he stqrted groping my breasts and it really hurt. i was pleading him to stop but he would just say "shut up bitch".
he then pulled my skirt off and slid my panties down. he told me to lay on the bed with my legs spread, so i did. he then started groping my breasts and playing with my cunt.
after this ge suddenly shuved his huge dick up my virgin vagina. it really hurt i wanted to scream but made sure i didnt so that he didnt kill me. once he was finished he flipped me ovee and started raping my ass hole the pain was unbearable.
he then stuck a huge vibrator up my vagina and left me.
he came back 4hours later and took the vibrator out. i wished i could die the pain was increadable. he told me that i would be his little slut from now on and i was. he reoeated all of this and worse for the next year and a bit until he left school.
he did terrible rhings tome such as: he branded my butt with a hot metal saying: i am a good slut. he stabbed me and burnt me and beat me and then left me and i was helpless without any future.
i am now 35 and still trying to get over my horrible childhood.
Monday, October 10th 2011 - 02:28:39 PM
Name: Tamar
Comments:Just reread the book...idk why but I have to help if I can I know the trauma because I was sexualy abused and raped...I never told till this year what happened 9 years ago I can't forget... I don't feel comfortable leaving my email by plz don't be afraid to talk on here I need to share and help...praying for u all...stay strong be a survivor<3
Monday, October 3rd 2011 - 02:02:54 AM
Name: Tamar
Comments:I never told anyone...it's probably hard to understand if its never been reality...I finally told the man I've known and loved for over a year and a half...he's helped me so much... I was afraid his respect or love for me would be damaged but it didn't...God had used everything to make me stronger and my future brighter...thank-You my best friend...
Saturday, October 1st 2011 - 11:07:33 PM
Name: Tamar
Comments:I was eight when I found myself where I never wanted to be...I'm now 17 and I still have flash backs and fear mixed with self hate... But I'm a survivor... Christ reached out to me when I had no one and I became His child... Fear is never wrong unless u let it control u...God is there for you just as He was for me...I'm on a journey of healing but I'm not alone... I forgave bt I had to choose to...
I know it may seem that your life is over and not worth living but it is! Don't make the choice to be a victim not a survivor...
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Name: tynk
Comments:i was raped my by brothers father when i was 6 years old, i told my mum had tests done but never persued it further, it has haunted me thru my luife... i have issues... lots of them, lots of relationships have broken down because i get flashbacks and dont want sex it repulses me... well im thinking of getting justice so im able to move on,, just too scared incase people wont believe me :(
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Name: Renee Brideau 2011
Comments:I truly am scared of going though it again.....
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Name: Mr. T
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Name: Fran
Comments:it was my fault
Thursday, October 28th 2010 - 02:59:13 AM
Name: summer
Comments:i admire all of your strengths. i have never been raped or sexually abused, but i can feel what your feeling. i am only 12 years old, but i feel i am very mature for my age. i can understand how you are feeling right now and you have my support. people should think about what they are doing and how discusting and vile it is to rape someone, also the police should do more about it after reading some of these, they dont seem to be very much help and i dont think that is right. everyone out there dont be afraid to speak up. no one will think your dirty or dicusting, but if they do they arent werth talking to or even seeing again. so as i said before dont be afraid to speak up. tell some one you can trust, like you r parents or your friends or whoevers close to you.
thinking of you all xx
Tuesday, October 19th 2010 - 03:07:06 PM
Name: Louise Kramer
Comments:i am a 55 pre-op male to female transgexual. 20 yrs ago a stranger broke into my flat raped me at knifepoint. the police were very caring but even tho this man returned to my flat everyday for 7 months to get in to kill me he wasnt caught. there was no support for me because i am transexual. now 20 yrs on the police have found this man. there is to be a trial. i have not coped during the past 20 yrs, constantly fearful and flashbacks, i ended up taking so many drugs to block it out. of course it didnt. now i am back re-living that night and the following 7 months. my local council officer told me it was my fault and what did i expect because i am ts. again i am scared to leave my current flat, scared anyone looks at me, i feel so alone and have sat in my bath with a razorblade - i cant do it because i am so weak yet this pain is killing me. as it is i am judged daily for being different, this man killed me inside 20 yrs ago and now i have to face a trial. the cps and police are confident of success but will i ever find peace and closure?
Sunday, October 17th 2010 - 01:47:28 PM
Name: Stephanie
Saturday, September 11th 2010 - 08:22:38 AM
Name: Banjul Kumar, Lucknow (U.P.) India
Comments:A very good collection of quotes & thoughts.
Keep it up.
My Best wishes to promoters.
Tuesday, September 7th 2010 - 10:52:40 PM
Name: zahra
Comments:hi sisters x
Friday, August 27th 2010 - 09:25:19 AM
Name: FJWL
Comments:there is such thing as hope after rape. Us women should not be victims rather we are survivors.
visiting websites like these are steps in a positive direction. i found that they have helped me realise that what happened is wrong and how you are feeling is normal.

i myself was raped by my boyfriend, who is violent and stalks me. to admit this i realise takes courage, great courage. write it down and you are helping yourself and other women.

i reported it to the policce not long ago.

Sunday, August 8th 2010 - 09:15:15 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:FOLLOWED..But what i do know is that i made the right choice by carring on so i could get justice once and for all. It has been hard but i know if i can go through all this in just one centre then i know other people out there and have the courage to stand up and do what i did i hope you do it makes you a much stronger person
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 11:44:54 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:FOLLOWED..But what i do know is that i made the right choice by carring on so i could get justice once and for all. It has been hard but i know if i can go through all this in just one centre then i know other people out there and have the courage to stand up and do what i did i hope you do it makes you a much stronger person i know i will be when im older i will be that woman that is stronger and wiser and can tackle anything that comes in my way i hope the other girls in the world will do this.
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 11:29:30 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:FOLLOWED...but i didnt i fought and fought hard to get justice done and i have but i still have the night mares and i dont want to go to councilling as it is so hard for me to say it all outloud its easier just writing it all down that way its better for me and who ever is reading it. I know some day it will get easier but it has already been a year and im still not over this and its been god knows how many years of the other ones and i still havent got over them so who knows.
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 11:22:05 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:FOLLOWED...but i didnt i fought and fought hard to get justice done and i have but i still have the night mares and i dont want to go to councilling as it is so hard for me to say it all outloud its easier just writing it all down that way its better for me and who ever is reading it. I know some day it will get easier but it has already been a year and im still not over this and its been god knows how many years of the other ones and i still havent got over them so who knows.
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 11:19:53 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:FOLLOWED...abuse i was so thrilled when they found him guilty he is mnow getting sentenced on the 13th july 2010 but that does not mean i am over what he has done to me and what every one else has done to me i am now on depresant tablets to help me and to help me sleep as i wake up every night in sweats thinking that he is still there over the top of me i have even tried ending my life because of it all
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 11:17:17 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:FOLLOWED...abuse i was so thrilled when they found him guilty he is mnow getting sentenced on the 13th july 2010 but that does not mean i am over what he has done to me and what every one else has done to me i am now on depresant tablets to help me and to help me sleep as i wake up every night in sweats thinking that he is still there over the top of me i have even tried ending my life because of it all but i didnt i fought and fought hard to get justice done and i have but i still have the night mares and i dont want to go to councilling as it is so hard for me to say it all outloud its easier just writing it all down that way its better for me and who ever is reading it.
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 11:17:17 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:FOLLOWED....The man kept on pleading not guilty to rape and sexual abuse. I had to go to court on the 14 june 2010 and tell the judge and the jury my side of it, his barrister was twisting it all round saying it was my fault and that i was the one that consented the sex to take place i broke down in tears and said that i didnt on the 17th june 2010 the verdict came he was found guilty of rape and sexual abuse
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 11:15:19 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:FOLLOWED....The man kept on pleading not guilty to rape and sexual abuse. I had to go to court on the 14 june 2010 and tell the judge and the jury my side of it, his barrister was twisting it all round saying it was my fault and that i was the one that consented the sex to take place i broke down in tears and said that i didnt on the 17th june 2010 the verdict came he was found guilty of rape and sexual abuse i was so thrilled when they found him guilty he is mnow getting sentenced on the 13th july 2010 but that does not mean i am over what he has done to me and what every one else has done to me i am now on depresant tablets to help me and to help me sleep as i wake up every night in sweats thinking that he is still there
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 11:10:23 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:FOLLOWED...When i went to get myself checked out by the doctor to see if there was any bruising there wasnt none but his semen was inside of me which showed that sexual intercourse had been taking place, but it was not a woman that examined me it was a man to top it all off he was asian and the man that raped me was asian. When he examined me i was screaming and crying my friend came with me and she was asleep in the other room and i woke her up coz of my cries she was like a rock to me the whole way through it.
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 11:06:30 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:FOLLOWED...When i went to get myself checked out by the doctor to see if there was any bruising there wasnt none but his semen was inside of me which showed that sexual intercourse had been taking place, but it was not a woman that examined me it was a man to top it all off he was asian and the man that raped me was asian. When he examined me i was screaming and crying my friend came with me and she was asleep in the other room and i woke her up coz of my cries she was like a rock to me the whole way through it. The man kept on pleading not guilty to rape and sexual abuse. I had to go to court on the 14 june 2010 and tell the judge and the jury my side of it, his barrister was twisting it all round saying it was my fault and that i was the one that consented the sex to take place i broke down in tears and said that i didnt on the 17th june 2010
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 11:01:27 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:FOLLOWED...When i was 19 years old i went out down town with my friends and i got raped by a man in his car i was so histerical by what had just happened as this had never happened to me before only the sexual abuse this was only a year ago and i still cannot get over it now. i told my friend about it and she phoned the police straight away if it wasnt for her i dont know what i would of done about it.
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 10:59:14 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:FOLLOWED...When i was 19 years old i went out down town with my friends and i got raped by a man in his car i was so histerical by what had just happened as this had never happened to me before only the sexual abuse this was only a year ago and i still cannot get over it now. i told my friend about it and she phoned the police straight away if it wasnt for her i dont know what i would of done about it. When i went to get myself checked out by the doctor to see if there was any bruising there wasnt none but his semen was inside of me which showed that sexual intercourse had been taking place, but it was not a woman that examined me it was a man to top it all off he was asian and the man that raped me was asian.
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 10:54:00 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:FOLLOWED...When i was 19 years old i went out down town with my friends and i got raped by a man in his car i was so histerical by what had just happened as this had never happened to me before only the sexual abuse this was only a year ago and i still cannot get over it now. i told my friend about it and she phoned the police straight away if it wasnt for her i dont know what i would of done about it. When i went to get myself checked out by the doctor to see if there was any bruising there wasnt none but his semen was inside of me which showed that sexual intercourse had been taking place, but it was not a woman that examined me it was a man to top it all off he was asian and the man that raped me was asian. When he examined me i was screaming and crying my friend came with me and she was asleep in the other room and i woke her up coz of my cries she was like a rock to me the whole way through it. The man kept on pleading not guilty to rape and sexual abuse. I had to go to court on the 14 june 2010 and tell the judge and the jury my side of it, his barrister was twisting it all round saying it was my fault and that i was the one that consented the sex to take place i broke down in tears and said that i didnt on the 17th june 2010 the verdict came he was found guilty of rape and sexual abuse
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 10:49:55 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:FOLLOWED....When i was 19 years old i went out down town with my friends and i got raped by a man in his car i was so histerical by what had just happened as this had never happened to me before only the sexual abuse this was only a year ago and i still cannot get over it now. i told my friend about it and she phoned the police straight away if it wasnt for her i dont know what i would of done about it. When i went to get myself checked out by the doctor to see if there was any bruising there wasnt none but his semen was inside of me which showed that sexual intercourse had been taking place, but it was not a woman that examined me it was a man to top it all off he was asian and the man that raped me was asian. When he examined me i was screaming and crying my friend came with me and she was asleep in the other room and i woke her up coz of my cries she was like a rock to me the whole way through it. The man kept on pleading not guilty to rape and sexual abuse. I had to go to court on the 14 june 2010 and tell the judge and the jury my side of it, his barrister was twisting it all round saying it was my fault and that i was the one that consented the sex to take place i broke down in tears and said that i didnt on the 17th june 2010 the verdict came he was found guilty of rape and sexual abuse i was so thrilled when they found him guilty he is mnow getting sentenced on the 13th july 2010 but that does not mean i am over what he has done to me and what every one else has done to me i am now on depresant tablets to help me and to help me sleep as i wake up every night in sweats thinking that he is still there over the top of me i have even tried ending my life because of it all but i didnt i fought and fought hard to get justice done and i have but i still have the night mares and i dont want to go to councilling as it is so hard for me to say it all outloud its easier just writing it all down that way its better for me and who ever is reading it. I know some day it will get easier but it has already been a year and im still not over this and its been god knows how many years of the other ones and i still havent got over them so who knows. But what i do know is that i made the right choice by carring on so i could get justice once and for all. It has been hard but i know if i can go through all this in just one centre then i know other people out there and have the courage to stand up and do what i did i hope you do it makes you a much stronger person i know i will be when im older i will be that woman that is stronger and wiser and can tackle anything that comes in my way i hope the other girls in the world will do this. KEEP STRONG GIRLS NEVER LET FEAR GET THE BETTER OF YOU DON'T LET IT STOP YOU STRIKE THAT GOAL. Thank you so much all my love xxxxxx
If you need to talk to me about anything that you think might occur to you please e-mail me on marie_4_gazza@hotmail.com Thank you xxx
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 10:46:58 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:FOLLOWED....After that i thought that people may stop doing this and i will be able to live a normal life but it didnt stop there.
when i was 15 years old my brother came on to me when i was in his flat, he kissed me and tried to go on top of me but that is when i shouted NO and started crying he got very shakey and got off me and sed sorry then went out of the room i finally thought that i have had enough of people thinking that they can do what they want to me and get away with it and me just sit there and do nothing. But yet i did not tell any one about it as he was my brother and i love him plus he was going through a rough patch and i did not want it to hover over my family and my family to hate him for this so yet again i kept it a secret and locked it away with the rest of them.
When i was 16 years old i was in college doing my NVQ level 1 of hairdressing i met new friends and i went out to a opening night pub with my friend i know i was only 16 but i could pass as if i was 18 and legal to drink. there was a man there who knew my friend and he came back to her house with us for a drink abck at theirs but they all went to bed and i flaked out on the settee. When i woke up there was the man that came back with us touching me under my pants just like before when i was 6 but this time all the way down kissing my neck and poking me harder to the point it was hurting i quickly got up and said what are you doing leave me alone and started crying i ran upstairs to where my friend was sleeping and tried to wake her up to tell her but she didnt wake up so i lied there and cried myself to sleep as i was falling asleep i heard the door open and close it was my attacker that left as he knew what he had done to me. I did not tell anyone about this when it first happened that was until my dad came into my room and found me crying thats when i said "im sorry dad i have been sexually abused two weeks ago" thats when my dad phoned the police and told them about it. Unfortunatly there wasnt enough evidence and plus i couldnt go to college as the lad that done this to me his sister was in the same class as me so she was fuman making my life even more harder than it was so i dropped all of the charges against him just so i could go to college and make my life that little bit easier
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 10:44:55 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:FOLLOWED...The next time it happened was when i was about 6 this was by my own cousin he used to put me on the counter when no one was around and touch me under my knickers and kiss me on the lips and same again i just thought it was normal and maybe i was special as thats what he told me so yet again i told no one and to this day still no one knows about it.
A couple of years passed and i dont think anything else happened. until i was about 13 years old and i went to the cinemas with my friend and whilst i was in the cinema another friend who tagged along with us sat next to me in the cinema and started going down my knickers i kept on telling him no but i was saying it quietly so no one in the cinemas could hear me, i kept on moving his hand away but he kept on putting it back there and i did not want that yet i still did not go to the police about it as i didnt think anything could be done about it. i started crying when we lost sight of him and my friend kept telling me to tell the police as she seen it all but i just thought no its not the first time its happened i will get over it in my own way.
When i was in school at the age of 14 i got shot against the wall and sexually abused by a year 10 pupil he shot me against the wall and started kissing me and touching me over my clothes i pushed him away from me and ran off crying i had to pull back the tears so that nobody would notice them and i had to walk past him in school everyday so that when i moved schools into a different one hoping it would of been better, still i never told anyone about that one either.
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 10:43:17 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:Hi...I KNOW ITS LONG BUT PLEASE READ IT THIS MAY HELP YOU IF THIS HAS HAPPENED TO YOU....It is really hard for me to say this to hardly anyone and there is some bits in here that i havent told anyone in my life i find it easier writing it down instead of saying it out loud if i did i would break down in tears and not be able to finish what i started.... It all began when i was young and through the years i was sexually abused but last year on the 2nd june 2009 i got raped by i man when i was out enjoying a night out with friends.
When i was only young i got sexually abused by my babysitter he was my brothers friend he used to babysit me n my sister whilst my mam n step dad went out. When it was just me and him my sister was out at her friends house at the time. i was going to sleep on his knee when i felt his hand lifting up my nighty and him slipping his hand under my knickers i didnt know what to do he was playing with me and his breathe on the back of my neck still cringes me to this day, but i didnt do nothing i still ask why to this day but there isnt an answer i actually thought it was normal how odd is that, eventually he finished and i just froze i did not tell my family about this as i thought it was normal i mean i was only about the age of 4 years old.
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 10:41:50 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:Hi...I KNOW ITS LONG BUT PLEASE READ IT THIS MAY HELP YOU IF THIS HAS HAPPENED TO YOU....It is really hard for me to say this to hardly anyone and there is some bits in here that i havent told anyone in my life i find it easier writing it down instead of saying it out loud if i did i would break down in tears and not be able to finish what i started.... It all began when i was young and through the years i was sexually abused but last year on the 2nd june 2009 i got raped by i man when i was out enjoying a night out with friends.
When i was only young i got sexually abused by my babysitter he was my brothers friend he used to babysit me n my sister whilst my mam n step dad went out. When it was just me and him my sister was out at her friends house at the time. i was going to sleep on his knee when i felt his hand lifting up my nighty and him slipping his hand under my knickers i didnt know what to do he was playing with me and his breathe on the back of my neck still cringes me to this day, but i didnt do nothing i still ask why to this day but there isnt an answer i actually thought it was normal how odd is that, eventually he finished and i just froze i did not tell my family about this as i thought it was normal i mean i was only about the age of 4 years old.
The next time it happened was when i was about 6 this was by my own cousin he used to put me on the counter when no one was around and touch me under my knickers and kiss me on the lips and same again i just thought it was normal and maybe i was special as thats what he told me so yet again i told no one and to this day still no one knows about it.
A couple of years passed and i dont think anything else happened. until i was about 13 years old and i went to the cinemas with my friend and whilst i was in the cinema another friend who tagged along with us sat next to me in the cinema and started going down my knickers i kept on telling him no but i was saying it quietly so no one in the cinemas could hear me, i kept on moving his hand away but he kept on putting it back there and i did not want that yet i still did not go to the police about it as i didnt think anything could be done about it. i started crying when we lost sight of him and my friend kept telling me to tell the police as she seen it all but i just thought no its not the first time its happened i will get over it in my own way.
When i was in school at the age of 14 i got shot against the wall and sexually abused by a year 10 pupil he shot me against the wall and started kissing me and touching me over my clothes i pushed him away from me and ran off crying i had to pull back the tears so that nobody would notice them and i had to walk past him in school everyday so that when i moved schools into a different one hoping it would of been better, still i never told anyone about that one either.
After that i thought that people may stop doing this and i will be able to live a normal life but it didnt stop there.
when i was 15 years old my brother came on to me when i was in his flat, he kissed me and tried to go on top of me but that is when i shouted NO and started crying he got very shakey and got off me and sed sorry then went out of the room i finally thought that i have had enough of people thinking that they can do what they want to me and get away with it and me just sit there and do nothing. But yet i did not tell any one about it as he was my brother and i love him plus he was going through a rough patch and i did not want it to hover over my family and my family to hate him for this so yet again i kept it a secret and locked it away with the rest of them.
When i was 16 years old i was in college doing my NVQ level 1 of hairdressing i met new friends and i went out to a opening night pub with my friend i know i was only 16 but i could pass as if i was 18 and legal to drink. there was a man there who knew my friend and he came back to her house with us for a drink abck at theirs but they all went to bed and i flaked out on the settee. When i woke up there was the man that came back with us touching me under my pants just like before when i was 6 but this time all the way down kissing my neck and poking me harder to the point it was hurting i quickly got up and said what are you doing leave me alone and started crying i ran upstairs to where my friend was sleeping and tried to wake her up to tell her but she didnt wake up so i lied there and cried myself to sleep as i was falling asleep i heard the door open and close it was my attacker that left as he knew what he had done to me. I did not tell anyone about this when it first happened that was until my dad came into my room and found me crying thats when i said "im sorry dad i have been sexually abused two weeks ago" thats when my dad phoned the police and told them about it. Unfortunatly there wasnt enough evidence and plus i couldnt go to college as the lad that done this to me his sister was in the same class as me so she was fuman making my life even more harder than it was so i dropped all of the charges against him just so i could go to college and make my life that little bit easier.
When i was 19 years old i went out down town with my friends and i got raped by a man in his car i was so histerical by what had just happened as this had never happened to me before only the sexual abuse this was only a year ago and i still cannot get over it now. i told my friend about it and she phoned the police straight away if it wasnt for her i dont know what i would of done about it. When i went to get myself checked out by the doctor to see if there was any bruising there wasnt none but his semen was inside of me which showed that sexual intercourse had been taking place, but it was not a woman that examined me it was a man to top it all off he was asian and the man that raped me was asian. When he examined me i was screaming and crying my friend came with me and she was asleep in the other room and i woke her up coz of my cries she was like a rock to me the whole way through it. The man kept on pleading not guilty to rape and sexual abuse. I had to go to court on the 14 june 2010 and tell the judge and the jury my side of it, his barrister was twisting it all round saying it was my fault and that i was the one that consented the sex to take place i broke down in tears and said that i didnt on the 17th june 2010 the verdict came he was found guilty of rape and sexual abuse i was so thrilled when they found him guilty he is mnow getting sentenced on the 13th july 2010 but that does not mean i am over what he has done to me and what every one else has done to me i am now on depresant tablets to help me and to help me sleep as i wake up every night in sweats thinking that he is still there over the top of me i have even tried ending my life because of it all but i didnt i fought and fought hard to get justice done and i have but i still have the night mares and i dont want to go to councilling as it is so hard for me to say it all outloud its easier just writing it all down that way its better for me and who ever is reading it. I know some day it will get easier but it has already been a year and im still not over this and its been god knows how many years of the other ones and i still havent got over them so who knows. But what i do know is that i made the right choice by carring on so i could get justice once and for all. It has been hard but i know if i can go through all this in just one centre then i know other people out there and have the courage to stand up and do what i did i hope you do it makes you a much stronger person i know i will be when im older i will be that woman that is stronger and wiser and can tackle anything that comes in my way i hope the other girls in the world will do this. KEEP STRONG GIRLS NEVER LET FEAR GET THE BETTER OF YOU DON'T LET IT STOP YOU STRIKE THAT GOAL. Thank you so much all my love xxxxxx
If you need to talk to me about anything that you think might occur to you please e-mail me on marie_4_gazza@hotmail.com Thank you xxx
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 10:34:39 AM
Name: Marie Jane
Comments:Hi...I KNOW ITS LONG BUT PLEASE READ IT THIS MAY HELP YOU IF THIS HAS HAPPENED TO YOU....It is really hard for me to say this to hardly anyone and there is some bits in here that i havent told anyone in my life i find it easier writing it down instead of saying it out loud if i did i would break down in tears and not be able to finish what i started.... It all began when i was young and through the years i was sexually abused but last year on the 2nd june 2009 i got raped by i man when i was out enjoying a night out with friends.
When i was only young i got sexually abused by my babysitter he was my brothers friend he used to babysit me n my sister whilst my mam n step dad went out. When it was just me and him my sister was out at her friends house at the time. i was going to sleep on his knee when i felt his hand lifting up my nighty and him slipping his hand under my knickers i didnt know what to do he was playing with me and his breathe on the back of my neck still cringes me to this day, but i didnt do nothing i still ask why to this day but there isnt an answer i actually thought it was normal how odd is that, eventually he finished and i just froze i did not tell my family about this as i thought it was normal i mean i was only about the age of 4 years old.
The next time it happened was when i was about 6 this was by my own cousin he used to put me on the counter when no one was around and touch me under my knickers and kiss me on the lips and same again i just thought it was normal and maybe i was special as thats what he told me so yet again i told no one and to this day still no one knows about it.
A couple of years passed and i dont think anything else happened. until i was about 13 years old and i went to the cinemas with my friend and whilst i was in the cinema another friend who tagged along with us sat next to me in the cinema and started going down my knickers i kept on telling him no but i was saying it quietly so no one in the cinemas could hear me, i kept on moving his hand away but he kept on putting it back there and i did not want that yet i still did not go to the police about it as i didnt think anything could be done about it. i started crying when we lost sight of him and my friend kept telling me to tell the police as she seen it all but i just thought no its not the first time its happened i will get over it in my own way.
When i was in school at the age of 14 i got shot against the wall and sexually abused by a year 10 pupil he shot me against the wall and started kissing me and touching me over my clothes i pushed him away from me and ran off crying i had to pull back the tears so that nobody would notice them and i had to walk past him in school everyday so that when i moved schools into a different one hoping it would of been better, still i never told anyone about that one either.
After that i thought that people may stop doing this and i will be able to live a normal life but it didnt stop there.
when i was 15 years old my brother came on to me when i was in his flat, he kissed me and tried to go on top of me but that is when i shouted NO and started crying he got very shakey and got off me and sed sorry then went out of the room i finally thought that i have had enough of people thinking that they can do what they want to me and get away with it and me just sit there and do nothing. But yet i did not tell any one about it as he was my brother and i love him plus he was going through a rough patch and i did not want it to hover over my family and my family to hate him for this so yet again i kept it a secret and locked it away with the rest of them.
When i was 16 years old i was in college doing my NVQ level 1 of hairdressing i met new friends and i went out to a opening night pub with my friend i know i was only 16 but i could pass as if i was 18 and legal to drink. there was a man there who knew my friend and he came back to her house with us for a drink abck at theirs but they all went to bed and i flaked out on the settee. When i woke up there was the man that came back with us touching me under my pants just like before when i was 6 but this time all the way down kissing my neck and poking me harder to the point it was hurting i quickly got up and said what are you doing leave me alone and started crying i ran upstairs to where my friend was sleeping and tried to wake her up to tell her but she didnt wake up so i lied there and cried myself to sleep as i was falling asleep i heard the door open and close it was my attacker that left as he knew what he had done to me. I did not tell anyone about this when it first happened that was until my dad came into my room and found me crying thats when i said "im sorry dad i have been sexually abused two weeks ago" thats when my dad phoned the police and told them about it. Unfortunatly there wasnt enough evidence and plus i couldnt go to college as the lad that done this to me his sister was in the same class as me so she was fuman making my life even more harder than it was so i dropped all of the charges against him just so i could go to college and make my life that little bit easier.
When i was 19 years old i went out down town with my friends and i got raped by a man in his car i was so histerical by what had just happened as this had never happened to me before only the sexual abuse this was only a year ago and i still cannot get over it now. i told my friend about it and she phoned the police straight away if it wasnt for her i dont know what i would of done about it. When i went to get myself checked out by the doctor to see if there was any bruising there wasnt none but his semen was inside of me which showed that sexual intercourse had been taking place, but it was not a woman that examined me it was a man to top it all off he was asian and the man that raped me was asian. When he examined me i was screaming and crying my friend came with me and she was asleep in the other room and i woke her up coz of my cries she was like a rock to me the whole way through it. The man kept on pleading not guilty to rape and sexual abuse. I had to go to court on the 14 june 2010 and tell the judge and the jury my side of it, his barrister was twisting it all round saying it was my fault and that i was the one that consented the sex to take place i broke down in tears and said that i didnt on the 17th june 2010 the verdict came he was found guilty of rape and sexual abuse i was so thrilled when they found him guilty he is mnow getting sentenced on the 13th july 2010 but that does not mean i am over what he has done to me and what every one else has done to me i am now on depresant tablets to help me and to help me sleep as i wake up every night in sweats thinking that he is still there over the top of me i have even tried ending my life because of it all but i didnt i fought and fought hard to get justice done and i have but i still have the night mares and i dont want to go to councilling as it is so hard for me to say it all outloud its easier just writing it all down that way its better for me and who ever is reading it. I know some day it will get easier but it has already been a year and im still not over this and its been god knows how many years of the other ones and i still havent got over them so who knows. But what i do know is that i made the right choice by carring on so i could get justice once and for all. It has been hard but i know if i can go through all this in just one centre then i know other people out there and have the courage to stand up and do what i did i hope you do it makes you a much stronger person i know i will be when im older i will be that woman that is stronger and wiser and can tackle anything that comes in my way i hope the other girls in the world will do this. KEEP STRONG GIRLS NEVER LET FEAR GET THE BETTER OF YOU DON'T LET IT STOP YOU STRIKE THAT GOAL. Thank you so much all my love xxxxxx
If you need to talk to me about anything that you think might occur to you please e-mail me on marie_4_gazza@hotmail.com Thank you xxx
Sunday, July 4th 2010 - 10:29:14 AM
Name: Sophie'Mclean
Comments:Hi am only 15, and just had to leave school because i feel guilty. I was first raped at 3 by my dads younger brother. The police never done anything as there wasnt any proof. I still get mental images and remember what he did, and in 2008 just after my close nana died 3 days after i went camping with friends and one of the boys friend stayed in a tent with me till they all went to the shops. I can still picture the attack and what he done. I did hide it from my mum & family for over 2 month and then i finally cried out. I started getting council'n but i cant seem to talk to anyone and the more am alone the more am scared and get flashbacks of the attack. Does anyone know a cure? For me to pass it oven one shoulder and get on with my life
Monday, June 14th 2010 - 11:38:57 AM
Name: Sophie'Mclean
Comments:Hi am only 15, and just had to leave school because i feel guilty. I was first raped at 3 by my dads younger brother. The police never done anything as there wasnt any proof. I still get mental images and remember what he did, and in 2008 just after my close nana died 3 days after i went camping with friends and one of the boys friend stayed in a tent with me till they all went to the shops. I can still picture the attack and what he done. I did hide it from my mum & family for over 2 month and then i finally cried out. I started getting council'n but i cant seem to talk to anyone and the more am alone the more am scared and get flashbacks of the attack. Does anyone know a cure? For me to pass it oven one shoulder and get on with my life
Monday, June 14th 2010 - 11:38:49 AM
Name: Lowry
Comments:Hi,

Thank you for posting your story, I am overwhelmed with emotion after reading it. You are NOT alone and you do not have to suffer in silence!

You have had to overcome so much at such a young age - you have come a long way! What strikes me about your story is your strength and determination to make a happier future for yourself and your daughter (Happy 1st Birthday for this month)

Wishing you love and peace, take care for now!

Lowry
Tuesday, June 1st 2010 - 03:43:19 PM
Name: Bleeding inside
Comments: I have been Raped multiple times when i was 5 and 6 i was ill with luekemia and i was molested by my babysitter.then when i was 8 my father raped me by the time i was 10 i was alone fed up with the pain and the hurt from the threats to be killed and i walked around with this ache and burden as i was 13 and 14 i was raped by my step dad and became pregnant and now i am 15 with a baby girl who is almost a year in june. i have came a long way and just have been feeling really alone lately but when i know i am no longer alone in situations like this i feel better but i do now find it fair for us to have to suffer this we need to help end this. thank you for reading my story and i hope we can all get a better future away from our past.
Monday, May 17th 2010 - 08:56:54 PM
Name: Lowry
Comments:A quote which I like

"A lot has been said about how to prevent rape. Women should learn self-defense. Women should lock themselves in their houses after dark. Women shouldn't have long hair and women shouldn't wear short skirts. Women shouldn't leave drinks unattended. ****, they shouldn't dare to get drunk at all. instead of that bullshit, how about: if a woman is drunk, don't rape her. if a woman is walking alone at night, don't rape her. if a women is drugged and unconscious, don't rape her. if a woman is wearing a short skirt, don't rape her. if a woman is jogging in a park at 5 am, don't rape her. if a woman looks like your ex-girlfriend you're still hung up on, don't rape her. if a woman is asleep in her bed, don't rape her. if a woman is asleep in your bed, don't rape her. if a woman is doing her laundry, don't rape her. if a woman is in a coma, don't rape her. if a woman changes her mind in the middle of or about a particular activity, don't rape her. if a woman has repeatedly refused a certain activity, don't rape her. if a woman is not yet a woman, but a child, don't rape her. if your girlfriend or wife is not in the mood, don't rape her. if your step-daughter is watching tv, don't rape her. if you break into a house and find a woman there, don't rape her. if your friend thinks it's okay to rape someone, tell him it's not, and that he's not your friend. if your "friend" tells you he raped someone, report him to the police. if your frat-brother or another guy at the party tells you there's an unconscious woman upstairs and it's your turn, don't rape her, call the police and tell the guy he's a rapist. tell your sons, god-sons, nephews, grandsons, sons of friends it's not okay to rape someone. don't tell your women friends how to be safe and avoid rape. don't imply that she could have avoided it if she'd only done/not done x. don't imply that it's in any way her fault. don't let silence imply agreement when someone tells you he "got some" with the drunk girl. don't perpetuate a culture that tells you that you have no control over or responsibility for your actions".
Monday, May 10th 2010 - 04:05:32 PM
Name: LOWRY
Comments:Update – please see message below (RAPED march 2009)

Thursday, October 8th 2009 - 06:53:13 PM
I was raped six months ago after getting into a taxi by myself after an evening out with friends. I have reported it to the police and they have a DNA match but can’t locate him.

I can’t sleep
I have nightmares
I have not worked since being raped
I blame myself as I had been drinking
I should not have got in a taxi by myself

My female partner of seven years will leave me………………..I so scared all the time and hardly leave my house. I drink to forget sometimes but often it makes me feel much worst.

I don’t know how I will get though this and I feel my life has ended!!!!!

I found this website very comforting as I feel very alone.

Thank you
Thursday, October 8th 2009 - 06:53:13 PM

UPDATE........Sunday 9th May 2010.......................

I will never forget being raped and beaten, it has changed my life! I still have nightmares (not as often) and I am receiving treatment for Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. I DON’T BLAME MYSELF ANYMORE AND HATE AND WANT TO KILL THE OPPORTUNIST MONSTER WHO RAPED ME!

WHY, in the 21st do we have a system where ONLY 6% of cases are convicted – MEN WHO RAPE NEED TO KNOW THAT THERE ARE CONSEQUENCES FOR THEIR DISGUSTING BEHAVIOUR FOR EXAMPLE:- A LONG PRISON SENTENCE WHERE THEY ARE PUNISHED DAY AFTER DAY OR THEIR PENIS CUT OFF!!!!!

I am angry how myself and other women are being treated after being violently raped – WE NEED TO COME TOGETHER AS WOMEN WHO HAVE SURVIVED AND FIGHT FOR FAIRER RIGHTS FOR WOMEN AND JUSTICE FOR ALL WOMEN WHO HAVE BEEN ABUSED/RAPED!

My niece is 14 years old…..I want to fight for a fair/better system for her as well as for me – I want to protect my nieces from any badness in this world!

On a personal note:-

My partner and I will be celebrating our 8th year together :-)
I have a lovely family and friends who I have now asked for help
I am starting to seek any type of job until I start my PGCE in September

I DON’T DRINK ALCOHOL AS IT MAKES ME FEEL MUCH WORSE
MY SLEEP IS GETTING BETTER
I LEAVE THE HOUSE MOST DAYS TO UNDERTAKE NORMAL ACTIVITIES (walk, food shopping, VISTING FAMILY, FRIENDS)
I AM STARTING TO READ AGAIN AS I AM now ABLE TO CONCENTRATE

I SEE A FUTURE, A FUTURE WITH MY PARTNER WHO I LOVE AND ADORE – WE HAVE BEEN TOGETHER FOR NEARLY 8 YEARS, SHE IS MY ROCK!

I AM DETERMINED TO CAMPAGNE FOR FAIRER RIGHTS AND JUSTIC FOR WOMEN IN THE 21ST CENTURY! PLEASE HELP – LET'S COME TOGETHER TO HELP ALL WOMEN WHO HAVE BEEN RAPED/SEXUALLY ABUSED!!

I FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE FOUND THIS WEBSITE, IT HAS GIVEN ME HOPE IN MY DARKESS HOUR AND HOPE AND FAITH TO CARRY ON! THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH AND THANK YOU TO ALL WHO HAVE LEFT MESSAGES! TAKE CARE FOR NOW

PLEASE, PLEASE KNOW THAT THERE IS LIVE AFTER RAPE/SEXUAL ABUSE.
IT TAKES TIME TO HEAL AND I’M STILL HEALING…………..Speak again soon. x
Sunday, May 9th 2010 - 01:43:09 PM
Name: jane
Comments:i was 10 yrs old when 2 family members locked me in room anddid what they did, the worst thing is that it happened more than once and i have never told anyone before because i was to scared, my husband knows something is wrong but has no idea justhow bad it was as i was also abused by someone else which he knows about.
after 30 yrs i finally have said i need help.
i have lived with this everyday but for me just pretending it didnt happen was ok, till now.
Wednesday, April 28th 2010 - 02:16:15 AM
Name: Amy warren
Comments:The Dreambook has been a great help too me, reading other peoples stories has shown me that i am not alone and that i am strong enough to get through what has happened.
It's been nearly 5 years now since i was raped by my best friend, i will never forget what happened and how i was emotionaly affected by it but i am now ready too move on. I am getting married in august too a man i love n who treats me the way every woman deserves too be treated.
I feel that my experience (as bad as it is) will help me too help others so i am planning to go back too college and become a rape councillor!
i used too think (and let) what happened beat me but i have realised now that i am strong enough too fight through, i do still have bad days where i think about it but my brillient fiance helps me through!

All of you people that have suffered in one way or another are amazing and are all strong enough too fight it. all the emotians you are feeling will be hard and scary but it will all be worth fighting through in the end.
Good luck too you all and stay strong.

xxxxxxxxxx
Monday, March 15th 2010 - 05:36:23 PM
Name: hans (indonesia)
Comments:help me for survive
Tuesday, February 23rd 2010 - 03:02:17 AM
Name: UNFORGIVABLE
Comments:i havent been raped but i know the feeling you woman are going through. I felt the same way after my sexual harassment and i told my story to friends and family they told me it could've been worse nothing is worse then not feeling yourself in the body you were given. I applaud you all telling your story making us younger kids in the new generation understand those men do not have control over us we can get over it and it may not be easy but it is worth it.
Wednesday, January 20th 2010 - 04:06:00 PM
Name: Jenestrar Starowicki
Comments:I found this site very helpful ive been raped more than once in my life and know the great injustice rape victims get and i hope in the future rape victims are given the due help and support they truly need and are not left to suffer as i was alone and in pain.
Thursday, January 14th 2010 - 07:41:03 AM
Name: Tiana
Comments:I would just like to say thank you to everyone who has left a message here on my guestbook. Although I haven't updated the website much of late, I still read what people have said.

I echo what Ellen has said below. There is life after rape and abuse. Life can and does get better, but it takes time, hard work and patience.

We all have the ability to be happy, find love and even enjoy life. I know this because that's where I am in my own life.

That doesn't mean that I have forgotten what happened to me, or that I've forgiven the people in my life who have hurt me, I have the physical and mental scars as a daily reminder. But, I chose to start to live again.

Remember you are never alone, as most of the people who have left messages are going through the same type of thing
themselves. We know it wasn't your fault. None of us asks for bad things to happen to us.

I hope one day that you can all get through to know what it is to live and enjoy life again.

I wish everyone a happy, healthy and safe New Year.

Best Wishes

Tiana
Thursday, December 31st 2009 - 11:00:58 AM
Name: ellen
Comments:i have used this site for years and always come here when i need help or feel down. Today is the opposite. I want people to know there is life, love and happiness after rape. It may not always seem like it but there is always hope. Never allow others to make you doubt yourself. You can survive more than you think and you have to grab happiness with both hands, don't push it away. Be strong be happy and keep trying. Good luck x x
Friday, December 25th 2009 - 02:01:59 PM
Name: F.B
Comments:i live in the UK.
and i am mourning my honour.

i come from a society where a woman remaining a virgin until she is married is held as a great honour.

so when he did it, i never told my mother or my sisters.
what can i say? my boyfriend did it? how would they take that..that it was all my fault.

i log onto this website everyday now. i read over all the stories, and everyday i cry. and everyday i mourn.

would conselling help? no. becuae i will always believe that this was my fault.

women, please remain strong. we need women like you in the world as inspiration.

the lady which is TIANA- all though i may never meet you, i hold you in a position as high as my mother.
you underwent a traumatic experience, and you have moved on to help others.

Sunday, December 20th 2009 - 04:30:54 PM
Name: Beth Horne
Comments:Raped 15 months ago by aquantince, drugged (he put it in coca cola), came too with him on top of me, in my own kitchen. Awaiting to know if it is to go to trial.
Not surviving, just existing.
Friday, December 18th 2009 - 07:06:41 AM
Name: Abigail
Comments:This site really helped me cope with my experience and now I have a better understanding that my feelings are normal and I'm not crazy. I live in the US, but this site is a huge help for those of us who are dealing with this here as well.
Sunday, December 13th 2009 - 08:10:05 AM
Name: ???
Comments:is it acceptable if my boyfriend raped me, even though we already had sex before.
Sunday, November 29th 2009 - 11:57:36 AM
Name: Dave
Comments:I am a volunteeer in a local hospital, and one of the patients said I should write a book of humorous poetry.
Ok, I said, and my thoights went dead.
If you have written any poems, published or not, hysterican oir not, please email them and a short biography to DavidSchwartzG@AOL.com
I promise you will get only recogniion, non money.
Thank you
Dave
DavidSchwartzG@AOL.com
Sunday, November 15th 2009 - 08:39:02 AM
Name: shannon
Comments:all of these storys are very heartbreaking , sad and absolutley apalling , i have no idea what it is like to have child abuse , sexual abuse or be raped or anything but i have a fair idea of what its like to have your parents argue and to have your father beat your mother as this has happened several times , i am now 12 years old and you are probably wondering why i know so many mature and long descriptive words , the reason is after having my parents ruin part of my childhood i have became more independant and free thinking student in my school , i am fairly mature for my age.
Saturday, November 14th 2009 - 05:07:19 AM
Name: Wish I Was Stronger
Comments:It has almost been six months since i was raped. he was my boyfriend. I am fifteen and he 17. i have yet to tell anyone about it. i dont know who to get support from. i ahve pushed away all of my family and friends. i cant sleep and i cant eat.

there are women out there who have gone through this and come out stronger on the other side. you are all amazing women.
Friday, October 23rd 2009 - 07:30:24 AM
Name: hazel downer
Monday, October 19th 2009 - 05:57:53 AM
Name: floss
Comments:Dear Lowry,

Glad u found this place I found it useful in my really difficult times. What u are feeling is completely normal even though its hard not to feel that way.

Floss x
Wednesday, October 14th 2009 - 04:57:49 AM
Name: rehan
Comments:hellow
Friday, October 9th 2009 - 08:57:51 PM
Name: Lowry
Comments:I was raped six months ago after getting into a taxi by myself after an evening out with friends. I have reported it to the police and they have a DNA match but can’t locate him.

I can’t sleep
I have nightmares
I have not worked since being raped
I blame myself as I had been drinking
I should not have got in a taxi by myself

My female partner of seven years will leave me………………..I so scared all the time and hardly leave my house. I drink to forget sometimes but often it makes me feel much worst.

I don’t know how I will get though this and I feel my life has ended!!!!!

I found this website very comforting as I feel very alone.

Thank you
Thursday, October 8th 2009 - 06:53:13 PM
Name: floss
Comments:Hi all, how is everyone? i just wrote an 8 page splurge of my life to my counsellor - she knows i can barely speak n poss hiding something. shes knows some of the stuff but im taking the opportunity to tell her everything - she really lovely and genuine although im slighlty concerned myself (being a practioner) that she gets good supervision!!!! lol

loz
Saturday, October 3rd 2009 - 03:55:19 PM
Name: A fighter and survivor
Comments:Its been 3 years since I was raped. Something which I still fear and struggle whilst continually blaming myself for what happened.

I really admire your courage Tianna and wish inside I could posess the strength that you have... so I can get through what happened to me.

Inside I know it wasnt my fault but I feel to blame for not stoping them. I blame myself for every little thing they did to me.
I relive it so many times. But it never gets any easier.

A few months after my 17th birthday I was heading up to see m y boyfriend. I struggled along and got myself lost, I asked two men for directions and they gave gladly. I followed their directions and found myself in a dar place covered and hidden. I went to go back and they had followed me hitting me so hard I fouught back but nothing stopped them I passed out afte coming round my hands were tied behind my back andone was kneeling on my back Crying and shouting he eventually got off my back but the other man wouldn't stop... I heard a zip undo and felt a knife against my throat. I was forced to give oral whilst the other raped me...

I bit him and got hit with the handle of the knife I passed out. I came round and i could hear them laughing calling me pathetic I begged them to kill me as theyspat in my face and walked off. I lay there crying. I never went to the police. even with the physical evidence they wouldnt ever believe me I told myself. I wish I had and maybe I would be at peace now

How do I go on knowing every way i turn there will be something out there to knock me down?
Tuesday, September 29th 2009 - 06:50:34 PM
Name: x
Comments:i lost control of my life. why is it that u feel like u r jst gettin back on ur feet when life pulls u back down. i started to cut again, not sleepin constantly having vivid flashbacks and broke down in work and to everyone else its was for no reason at all. had to give in and scream for help. i'm back under the docs and this time they have put me on anti-depressants. i really didn't want to go down this route as its now officail that i can't cope. i hope there will some day be an end to this cos i can't go on feelin like this all the time. there must be more to life than this. it has been 5 yrs since and still feels like it happened yesterday and i'm constantly watch for him walkin dwn the street which is silly cos he didn't even live in the same town. but u never know he knows which town i'm from seens he followed me here. plse can some1 help me to switch these thoughts off.
Tuesday, September 22nd 2009 - 03:30:48 PM
Name: floss
Comments:Hi, I was a regular user of this site 5/6 yrs ago and thought about it again tonight as thoughts of SI re emerge. Ive found a wonderful counsellor ablight through other issues but weve been working on the rape ( nearly 8 yrs ago now).

I cant remember what my old username was but anyway, I think i may find support in this again at this moment in my life.

floss
Tuesday, September 22nd 2009 - 12:03:48 PM
Name: Kaylan Flowers
Sunday, September 20th 2009 - 04:52:23 PM
Name: Margie
Comments:Thanks for your beautiful and useful site.

I'm writing to ask if you'd be interested in linking to a new website I've launched on rape-related pregnancy and pregnancy loss, including pregnancy and parenting after sexual abuse and some information for partners, family and friends. It's a big site with lots of links, information and personal stories. I'd really appreciate it if you'd have a look and see what you think, and if you like it, link to it: http://www.pregnancypages.webs.com
Friday, August 7th 2009 - 04:56:31 AM
Name: X
Comments:I'm bak on the booze but i hav learnt my lesson n i will control it n not it wont control me. But it help me forget whats wrong wiv a few drinks. As long as i can stay away frm the blades i'm fine. My i shud of bn lukin at buyin school uniform tis summer. My baby wud of bn startin tis time. I'm 24 in couple of days n what hav i got 2 show for it. Scares, lost my baby n lettin my past control my life. If i can get som control bak in my life. Maybe i live instead of existin...n watchin the world past me by
Sunday, July 26th 2009 - 02:29:16 PM
Name: Angry
Comments:I just read "Let Go, Let Peace Come In Foundation" post. No one needs to send a picture of themselves to another person on the internet and by all means do NOT send them money. A 10.00 "donation"? That sounds like a $10.00 surcharge to me. Donation my foot! And why on earth would you want your picture used on their website. I would never want my picture plastered ont he internet for others to gawk at and feel sorry for me, and heaven forbid, perverts to fantasize over while they read about rape experiences. Sorry but no one should respond to that post and I think the owners of this site should be protecting the members a little bit better.
Thursday, July 2nd 2009 - 07:58:41 AM
Name: Survivor
Comments:I enjoyed reading the parable poem again, yet this is not by the person that is stated at the bottom, this is a very old poem that was written long long ago. Long before this site was created. You should really remove the name off the bottom and place " Author Unknown"
Thursday, July 2nd 2009 - 07:48:59 AM
Name: X
Comments:Is plse 2 say i'v managed 2 resist the temptation of cuttin but wil b shortly passin out. Hopefully tis way wil get som sleep 2nite 4 once. I can feel a sore head in the mornin. It was worth it tho
Tuesday, June 16th 2009 - 04:04:37 PM
Name: KT
Comments:is really struggling at the mo! it wud have been my baby's fourth b'day tis month, but all i have is the 'what if's' to cling to. i knw i cud never of lived with part of the d***khead that raped me always being part of my life. but it still doesn't stop me wondering what he/she wud be like now. what if this was my only chance, what if there was further complication wiv the miscarriage and i can no longer have kids, what if all the drinking did more harm to my body than i knw... i'm trying to luk forward to my hols wiv my best mate but worried bout sunbathing wiv all my scars on show. my friend knws that i've cut but dnt think she really knws to what extent. my close friends knws i'v cut but none have ever seen the scars i'v always kept them covered. my head is racing and can't make it stop, things are starting to bubble to the surface...feelings i thought i had stopped and they are happening more and more frequent again. i've tried to take my mind off it but there is only some much thing u can do at early hours for the morning.

i hope the 13 yr old is ok. plse put a comment on soon
Tuesday, June 16th 2009 - 02:27:20 PM
Name: KT
Comments:in reply to message below. 7th june 2009.

i'm here if you need to talk. please don't feel like that about yourself and please take help. i know you think it wud hurt your mum and it will at first but it will hurt her more when she finds out how long it has gone on for and that she didn't realise and do something about it. i know people always say that mums always know there children but this is not always the case. i didn't tell my mum and she has still know idea to this day of anything i'v been through but i have a small group of close friends that i turned to. i was raped by a stranger and i'm glad to say i'v never seen him since. but with you, you have to deal with this everyday and you are dealing with it cos otherwise you wouldn't have come to this website!! please take it from someone who has to fight every single day not to cut it is a lot easier when you hav a friend or a teacher that knows just to keep an eye on you make sure that you don't go back to cutting. a smile from them when your having a bad day makes all the difference.

if you can bring yourself to tell someone please do. the first few words are the hardest but only you know if you can. keep positive. thinking of you. x
Monday, June 8th 2009 - 02:40:04 PM
Name: it still goes on
Comments:i am a 13 year old girl who was forced to grow up when my mom re marryed ... she will never know that it started off a nothing but turned to so much more, to the point were my school guidence councilers suspected but i had to lie and say no way ...but it as the truth!! i hate him i want to tell sombodyy but i cant ... it hurts so bad i want to die i am ashamed and embaresed and scared and i feel numb i get frozen i have learned to focus on a happy part of my room... that is my closet were i picture my self locked in it so he cant get in...so he cant make me do all the things i hate ...

i have gotten to the point were i cut my legs ... i do it so i know that i am in control and not just him i do it on the back of my knees to stop the thoughts...it dosnt work!!!


somtimes i feel myself re .iving it over and over when i am at school .... i have this one teacher who i think suspects but still doubts i want to come clean and tell but it will breal my mommas hart

so please help mee
email me
add me on myspace
or face book just guide me
Sunday, June 7th 2009 - 10:04:02 PM
Name: young and alone
Comments:i cant survive it please help me its so hard and i want to come clean but it will tare my life even more appart...i have lied about it for so long ... i dont thinki could handle actualy ending it ...but thats all i want is to end it ... i have been cutting since the first time and hope to stop hopfuly this site will help
Sunday, June 7th 2009 - 09:48:14 PM
Name: yorkiebrowne
Comments:I would not have coped after I was raped if it weren't for this site. You are a godsend. I was raped 16 and a half years ago and I still have nightmares when going through periods of stress or change.

I never reported what happened and it took me 7 years to tell anyone but knowing that I was not alone when I finally did admit it made all the difference.

I hope that everyone here realises they are not alone, and no matter what the circumstances they are not to blame for what happened to them. It is only natural to have "What if....?" moments but don't let thrm rule your life.

Good luck x x x
Saturday, May 30th 2009 - 07:30:41 AM
Name: KT
Comments:re: hopeful (M). 23rd May 2009

hopeless and X are the same person. Me! x is when i'v had a drink, its easier than typing hopless. thanks for your support. i know things will get there eventually. its just really frustrating when you have good few weeks then bang you hit the brick wall. mind races and all you want to do is scream. i did fall back and cut again but only twice and they were not deep.
i must make an effort to come on here when i'm on a good day and not just when i'm at rock bottom. a good friend said to me if i'm feeling low not to look what i have been through but at how far i'v come. and each day i will get stronger. i so glad my friend found me this website people give each other so much support. offer is returned - i'm here if you need me.x
Thursday, May 28th 2009 - 01:37:26 PM
Name: hopeful
Comments:re: Monday, March 23rd 2009 - 02:38:14 PM name x
re: Wednesday, March 4th 2009 - 01:55:21 PM hopeless

I am in no way on expert on how to over come this shit bomb hand we were dealt, however I can offer hope to you both. It has been over ten years since I was raped by my cousins best friend and it is a work in progress to not hate myself for what he did, or to not cut. I can say I don't think of it every day as I used to, but sometimes it creeps up and won't go away. The truth is, ladies you can beat this, don't allow it to beat you. Again it is not an easy road and perhaps it would have been easier to have given up, Lord knows I have drank my way through numerous bottles in hopes that it would just go away. It doesn't, but it doesn't always rear it's ugly head in and win either.

The best advice I can give is to let it hurt and piss you off, it should piss you off, but get up the next morning and take a shower and get dressed, head high and try believing in you again. When you can not see who you are or who you were, rely on your friends to show you. It is ok to ask for help.

Secondly the cutting, you already know it doesn't work so when you want to cut, go for a jog or play poker on facebook or myspace or something. mindless shit to get your mind off of it. That too takes time and I don't always win that battle, but I try damn hard to not let him win. Good luck on this journey to re-finding yourselves, I am here if needed.
*hugs*


M
Saturday, May 23rd 2009 - 12:34:15 AM
Name: katie
Comments:http://www.myspace.com/surviivorsandthriivers

I MADE A WEBSITE CALLED SURVIVORS AND THRIVERS. THERE ARE INFORMATIONAL BLOGS. YOU ARE NOT ALONE
Monday, May 18th 2009 - 01:08:20 PM
Name: X
Comments:I thought i'd meet a normal bloke 4 once but yet again he he is like everyone else i dickhead that messes wiv ur head. I'm jst meant 2 b used.
Saturday, May 16th 2009 - 05:34:51 PM
Name: DD
Comments:I have been to Maytree it is a wonderfulplace and it saved my life,if you feel there is nothing left to try thenplease make one last effort and visit them I promise you wont regret it
Tuesday, April 28th 2009 - 11:31:36 AM
Name: Rose
Comments:http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=73126758654

For those one face bok please join the above group and join the StopRape campaign. x
Wednesday, April 22nd 2009 - 12:07:35 PM
Name: Courtney
Comments:to steve and G

I am a brilliant writer and I have nothing to say. the truth is so much more than I can express
Sunday, April 19th 2009 - 11:18:42 PM
Name: x
Comments:Thanks, this site had been a big help :)
Thursday, April 16th 2009 - 06:18:30 AM
Name: x
Comments:help me plse!! i cant cope wiv tryin to fit in wiv everyone its not me. i can't carry on trying to be normal when i'm in bits inside!! i thought i was getting to grips with my life but i'm not. its so hard to keep a smile on my face its so hard not burst into tears. i thought i was over the panic attacks but i guess not!! i thought the thoughts of hurting myself had gone away but they have not. i really want to but i knw its wrong but why does it feel like the right thing to do???? why am i a freak why am i like this?? why does this continue to destroy me. [lse help me!!!!
Friday, April 10th 2009 - 11:50:15 AM
Name: FiFi
Comments:Hello, it's nice to listen to all of you. I'm glad that the Higher Power pointed me toward all of you, because just a few minutes ago while my Bombay cat & my Snowshoe cat were cuddling/purring (curling?) me & my husband kept calling me all dayas I was sinking more & more deeply into depression & The Father with his howling Northern States wind kept howling outside at me "Talk to someone Fifi Talk to someone Talk to someone Fifi" while I kept saying back to Him while weeping tears "I don't want to talk to anyone I don't want to talk to anyone it hurts to live, Father, it hurts to live, living hurts," while Father just kept telling me to talk to someone, all of my cats usually fight but for the past 4 months they've given up fighting & just follow me around everywhere & sit next to around & on me & curl (cuddle/purr); it didn't Abba to just keep talking to me, the cats certainly didn't mind all their curling, so I went upstairs, took my epilepsy, medication, & came downstairs & found this site under "chat rooms for rape survivors. More later, y'all. I certainly hope that young man hasn't committed suicide. He needs himself a pet to love him & for him to take care of and to talk to. My half-Siamese, or meezers, converse with me. Anyways, I'll get back with ya, later. FiFi
Tuesday, April 7th 2009 - 01:32:25 PM
Name: x
Comments:i almost lasted 12months wiv getting my life back on track but i can't cope with this anymore. i have tried to be the strong one for everyone else but can't support myself. it's not get any easier you would think that after 4 1/2 years it wud be by now. will it ever get any easier??!!! i have stop the flashbacks but why do i still blame myself, why do i hate myself fo what that d**khead did. i so wish i had died that nite!! it wud have been easier than continue exist like this. he stole my life that day what have i got left... from someone that needs help! from someone that wants help. x
Monday, March 23rd 2009 - 02:38:14 PM
Name: Rose
Comments:Hello all,

I am currently putting together a book of survivors stories, if you would like to hsare your story or even just a poem of list of emotions/thoughts then I would be very grateful if you could email them to me on

rosannafraser@hotmail.co.uk

I can print them with your name or anonymously. xxx
Wednesday, March 18th 2009 - 03:07:24 AM
Name: shabzzz
Comments:I was raped and abused 2years ago my attacker walked away and ai leading a normal life.They say time is a good healer but I dont think so.Nothing helps,no one cares you just live in this hell forever.
Saturday, March 14th 2009 - 09:46:16 PM
Name: Samia
Comments:When I look in the mirror I see a million little pieces
Wednesday, March 11th 2009 - 08:32:38 PM
Name: killjoy
Comments:Name: Renee Brideau
Comments: Was raped and hated it and now I blame everybody including myself
Saturday, December 30 2007 - 04:43:42 AM
Saturday, March 7th 2009 - 01:59:06 PM
Name: hopeless
Comments:it's been nearly 12 months since i last put the blades to myself but its been really hard. i still have times were i want to but found it was hard to live myself having to tell my friend that i've done it again then it was to lock myself away for a few hours/ dsys until the thoughts passed. but recently its getting hard and hard to resist. i feel like i'm back on the slippery slope.. drinking has increased and nightmares have started. is my life going to a continually roller coaster of feeling control of my life and then back drowning under water, each time worse than the last. any advise on how to stay on one level somewhere in the middle??!!
Wednesday, March 4th 2009 - 01:55:21 PM
Name: Clair
Comments:My nym is Clair, im frm jhb in S.A. Im an ophan wit n0 parents. My dad died when i ws 2 wks old in 1995 Sep 29. Killed by my step dad who ws shot n they took hm 4 2yrs in jail. My mum died in 1999 june 25. Afta dat my step dad usd 2 rape me everyday until in 2002 he usd 2 sel me 2 hs frnds. I knew nthn, i jst thot it ws da way of life. Then in 2005 dec 8, this other wife of one of da men who usd to rape me took me to a social worker. After my mum died, i wsnt suposd 2 play with oda kids. 2days after da woman took me 2 a social worker, he ws arested 4 a life sentence. They took me 4 counciling n nw i stay in a home wit a mum n a dad who treat me beta. MY MUM RUINED MY CARRER! I WILL NEVER EVER FORGIVE HER! Im 14 ryt nw, bt im promoted 4 tyms at skul n im in da 9th grd. I wnt 2 b a speaker in the parliament n hope it works out.
Wednesday, March 4th 2009 - 12:13:23 PM
Name: ANUJ GOYAL
Comments:Motivation
Wednesday, February 18th 2009 - 09:17:41 PM
Name: Beth
Comments:Thank you for this site :)

My family dont even know this so I feel the need 2 tell someone.

When i was 16 (im 18 now) my boyfriend owed some money to a gang. Instead he decided to trade me in. I had no choice. I was raped and abused about 3 or 4 times a week for about 6 months before I managed to get the gang leader or pimp in court. They would capture me and torture me until I would agree to come and work for them, which I never will

Everyday, its still a struggle. Everyday, im still tryin 2 find me a reason to get out of bed.

I have an amazing best friend who helps me and holds my hand every step of the way, but i still fell really guilty as thats not really her job

I never thought something like this would happen to me.

I'm so scared of everything now and I feel like I should be over it by now as it has been 2 years

feel like it has to be my fault in some way, otherwise who would do that? so ashamed

desperately tryin not 2 self harm atm

anyway

thank u for a place to say all this... shall remember this in future

thank u

xxxx
Tuesday, February 17th 2009 - 03:20:22 PM
Name: Beth
Comments:Thank you for this site :)

My family dont even know this so I feel the need 2 tell someone.

When i was 16 (im 18 now) my boyfriend owed some money to a gang. Instead he decided to trade me in. I had no choice. I was raped and abused about 3 or 4 times a week for about 6 months before I managed to get the gang leader or pimp in court. They would capture me and torture me until I would agree to come and work for them, which I never will

Everyday, its still a struggle. Everyday, im still tryin 2 find me a reason to get out of bed.

I have an amazing best friend who helps me and holds my hand every step of the way, but i still fell really guilty as thats not really her job

I never thought something like this would happen to me.

I'm so scared of everything now and I feel like I should be over it by now as it has been 2 years

feel like it has to be my fault in some way, otherwise who would do that? so ashamed

desperately tryin not 2 self harm atm

anyway

thank u for a place to say all this... shall remember this in future

thank u

xxxx
Tuesday, February 17th 2009 - 03:20:12 PM
Name: Rohit
Comments:Its pathetic to see so many women getting trapped into this henious crime that even the judicial system or law cant do much about it than make it more difficult for the victims. The trauma and the experience i'm sure must be devastating, one that shatters the confidence and worse still, for no fault of that person and that too for the only reason that shes a woman?

She is a friend, a sister, a mother, a wife and yet what is it that triggers the evil in the men I fail to understand. If they are f***** so desperate, why cant they just go f*** in a brothel. I feel sorry for something like this that happens everyday, somewhere and someone still suffers in silence and the world just ignores her cries.

I only wish that someday justice would prevail when women have all the support to cut-off that d**k before it even starts thinking about commiting a shit like this.
Sunday, February 1st 2009 - 01:55:29 AM
Name: Rohit
Comments:Its pathetic to see so many women getting trapped into this henious crime that even the judicial system or law cant do much about it than make it more difficult for the victims. The trauma and the experience i'm sure must be devastating, one that shatters the confidence and worse still, for no fault of that person and that too for the only reason that shes a woman?

She is a friend, a sister, a mother, a wife and yet what is it that triggers the evil in the men I fail to understand. If they are f***** so desperate, why cant they just go f*** in a brothel. I feel sorry for something like this that happens everyday, somewhere and someone still suffers in silence and the world just ignores her cries.

I only wish that someday justice would prevail when women have all the support to cut-off that d**k before it even starts thinking about commiting a shit like this.
Sunday, February 1st 2009 - 01:54:46 AM
Name: Annalise
Comments:Haven't had much luck finding such a good info! GREAT JOB! Visit us too: drive actor ... divx movie ...
Saturday, January 17th 2009 - 09:24:08 PM
Name: Mama
Comments:I just found this site, great info. nice place for peole to tell their story, and for others to see thay are not alone. My mother was raped as a child, and it affected not only her life but also the next generations because she had never told, or dealt with any of it.
I live in Canada , and wanted you to know that you even touched someone " across the pond" thank you!!
My 5 yr old daughter was repeatedly raped and terrorized by an 11 yr old cousin, over a 2 mth period.Thankfully I saw a change in her and she was able to tell me what was going on, so it could be stopped. She has had counselling and seems to be getting thru it as best as someone can.
Now a yr later i find myself having a hard time dealing with it all. The fact that he can't be charged ( under Canadian law),and has basically gone un punished, and that my family still welcomes him into the fold, with open arms,sickens me.
Now its Mamas turn to deal with the rapes that affected my life.
Monday, January 12th 2009 - 08:10:26 PM
Name: I have no name
Comments:I have just found this site - I don't know if it will help me - I am a survivor of multiple rape and torture - I sometimes wonder how I live with this - but somehow I just seem to fail at committing suicide - someone found me and now I think I hate that person - I wish I was dead and didn't have to live with the memories.
Monday, January 12th 2009 - 08:19:22 AM
Name: Zachary
Comments:Wonderful and informative web site. I used information from that sites whats eating gilbert grape ... big jake ... its great.
Sunday, January 4th 2009 - 08:57:28 PM
Name: joe18
Sunday, January 4th 2009 - 04:58:42 PM
Name: Kesaniya
Comments:Hi Tiana, It has been 10 years since I came here to this website. It was too hard for me to continue being with you guys here after Maple's death. I was numb for weeks and then I stopped coming here for support. You, Paula, Kaet, Maple, Michele and others really help a lot back then. All of you survivors' experiences were inspiring stories that lead to my own surviving the sexual abuse experience when I was small.

p.s. RIP Maple. You were my hero and glad finally you're not hurting anymore.
Sunday, December 21st 2008 - 05:27:08 AM
Name: kiita and sophie
Comments:we are feeling reall bad we didnt read the comments first. please get through this. we realy hope that person didnt commit suicide, we read evry comment and they made us sad and think about how others feel. we get bullied, but we are dealing with it :D x speak soon lylal
englands wet!!! 10 days til xmas. 15.12.08
Monday, December 15th 2008 - 05:12:07 AM
Name: kiita and sophie
Comments:we are feeling reall bad we didnt read the comments first. please get through this. we realy hope that person didnt commit suicide, we read evry comment and they made us sad and think about how others feel. we get bullied, but we are dealing with it :D x speak soon lylal
englands wet!!! 10 days til xmas. 15.12.08
Monday, December 15th 2008 - 05:11:39 AM
Name: kiita and sophie
Comments:we are feeling reall bad we didnt read the comments first. please get through this. we realy hope that person didnt commit suicide, we read evry comment and they made us sad and think about how others feel. we get bullied, but we are dealing with it :D x speak soon lylal
englands wet!!! 10 days til xmas
Monday, December 15th 2008 - 05:11:07 AM
Name: sophi and kiita
Comments:well hello there. we are in PSHCE and are very bored, so hi!
Monday, December 15th 2008 - 05:01:27 AM
Name: Terran
Comments:I was raped in April of this year by my best friends boyfriend. I did exactly what I was always told to do. Go to the hospital, report it to the police, file charges. And what has come of it? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. That piece of shit is still walking around free as a bird. Our judicial system is such a fucking joke. I don't even know why I put myself through this. I wish now that I would have just kept it all to myself. What I have gone through since the rape has been worse than the rape itself. And the thing of it is, is that if I ever do get to court, he will probably walk free. The worst of it all is that my best friend took his side and actually believes that I consented to having sex with him. My boyfriend left me because he could not deal with the fact that I had been raped. I lost two of the most important people in my life during a time when I needed more support than ever. sigh... people are shit. And no one gives a damn. Maybe I will just take justice into my own hands. I would like to cut his fucking dick off and watch him bleed to death for what he has done. I suppose that is not a very healthy response, but I would rather be angry than depressed. I don't know what else to say, I know I am rambling, I am just so fucking angry and tired of this entire situation.
Wednesday, December 3rd 2008 - 06:01:09 PM
Name: Ricky
Comments:Poem i wrote for my sister



Secret Of Red

Hidden away in my best friends
The ones I tell all paper and pen
Beneath the cover all is said
The only one who know my secret of red

Pain and guilt built up inside
Simply not seen by anybody's eyes
Though not seen it's easy to find
Simply skin deep
Is this secret of mine

Sharp at the edges
Easy to cut
I start at my wrist
And then moved up

It trickles down
thick and slow
This crimson liquid
But nobody knows

Trapped away
are all of my thoughts
With the razor that first did it
And the boy that made me stop

A little book
Holding all of my secrets
Some of them I tell
While others it keeps them.
Friday, November 21st 2008 - 12:39:20 PM
Name: Heartless B1tch
Comments:A terrible story that makes hard reading, but i'm so glad that i did because i can see now that i'm not the only one that has lived through something as hideous as this more than once. My only problem is that I blame myself for not reporting it sooner which meant that others had to suffer exactly the same thing as I did. Maybe one day, i may feel strong enough to add my own story
Saturday, November 1st 2008 - 06:50:00 PM
Name: someone who is gonna do something
Comments:i am planning to form agroup to hunt and kill pedos beeing a father myself i hate anyone who could even think of halming a child in anyway, so dont do anything stupid by killing yourselves and letting these sick fuckers win at least kill the evil twats who did this to you first so they cant do it to someone else make a difference they are the freaks not you (im a normal familly man who is sick to death of hearing stories of people walking free after doing un imaginable crimes burgalars get longer in prison for fuck sake , lets make em pay. appolagies for my spelling . lets do it lets get together they dont deserve to live the longer they do another child is at risk .
Thursday, October 30th 2008 - 05:15:19 PM
Name: never forget
Comments:this is my irst time on this site and never knew of it before otherwise this is what i could of used. i have been raped twice once when i was 10 years old and i never told anyone and never reported it,it caused me to bottle up all the horrid feelings which inturn caused e to have my first epileptic fit caused by stress and was on medication till i was 14 and my second assult which happened was with my chldrens father which i did report as i was so scared it would cause another fit for keeping it a secret and that done nothing the police couldn't press charges as there was not enough evience and still to this day no-one in my family knows and i found out a few years ago i found out my sister was abussed by the same person who did it to me when i was ten and it made me feel sick to the bones as she is two years younger than me i am now thinking about reporting it to the police now.as it still rules my life and i do still self harm by punching walls as its the only way i can get rid of my anger
Saturday, October 18th 2008 - 11:13:21 AM
Name: X
Comments:I'm hopin the person that posted bout commitin suicide didn't. As much as i'v hit rock bottom n tried myself twice. I'm so glad i didn't. The past few months i'v realised that the if i did go through wiv it i wud of hurt so many people. People that i'v helped me over the years. So i'm hopin that person also has the support if not tis website shud b! No matter what life throws at us we hav the support of other people that hav bn through the same! No one else wud understand but we do
Tuesday, October 14th 2008 - 01:29:36 PM
Name: malisha
Comments:hey just checkin out the website
Sunday, October 12th 2008 - 10:08:33 PM
Name: I will die tomorrow
Comments:I am going to commit suicide. I am always being bullied. Since school, at work. No-one cares about me. I am insignificant in this world. I can't be bothered to live. Good-bye shitty world.
Monday, October 6th 2008 - 03:03:44 PM
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